So, hello. It’s been a while since I’ve actively attended to my own slice of the Web, here. To some of this I can attribute the machinations of your Jacks and your Zucks, and the efforts of Google to kill independent channels of distribution so as to consolidate their advertising empire. But, more to the point there is the issue of me.

I’ve been going through the ringer, the last couple of years. This hasn’t been good for some while, and it keeps getting worse. I don’t really know how I’m going to move forward. But, in and around related health issues, I’m trying to do some stuff! So, hey! If you like the kind of stuff I do, you may be in for some minor entertainment! Of a sort!

The biggest and longest-baking of the bunch is that I actually have a Patreon now. Yes, finally! About five years after I started to think about it, because I’m just that awesome. So go ahead and subscribe there, and you’ll get stuff to look at and read and maybe play. It’s a new thing, and I’ve not put up a lot of original content yet, but I’m working on stuff. There’s a big personal essay comin’… several days ago, in theory, but any time now in reality! You like that elliptic, yogurty New Yorker writing I do when I’m paying attention, right? Well, someone must! People used to pay me for it! Maybe now you can get in on the nostalgia train. Choo choo!

Or if you want to be more direct, there also is PayPal Direct. Which is direct. Because market-researched branding doesn’t lie! (Yes, my PayPal account is 20 years old. I figured out how to log in again.)

Seriously, I’d like to be able to live long enough to continue to do things. So these are both good options. There may be more! If you want to commission me to do something awesome, please let me know. This is the best of all worlds. Please do this, if you can. You know all the things I do, presumably. Or else I really wonder how you found your way here.

On that note, in effort to recall the art of word assembly and in some small measure of catharsis during this chaotic time, I have in recent weeks turned to the noble art of the fanfic. This is a new thing. I don’t consider it a major career move, but it has helped to rewire my head a bit to get me into producing stuff for the Patreon, so I won’t knock it too hard. If you’re interested in my extrapolation on the world of an extremely gay children’s cartoon (in every sense of that adjective), I present the following ongoing narrative, across two works, the second as-yet partially complete:

• Steven Universe: “Water Pressure” (5 chapters)
• Steven Universe: “Rise of the Crystal Crusader” (2+ chapters)

They’re actually pretty okay. Again, they’ve helped to get my head in order. If you haven’t watched the show, do so. It’s… I mean. If you’re here, you must know that children’s entertainment is often some of the best and most important storytelling that can be done in a culture. And the work on this show is some of the best and most important of our time. It’s become de rigueur to link this fan-made trailer, so there that is. (The joy remains, but it does get darker as it goes along.)

But enough pop culture babble. Back to advertising me. Me! Pay me money and I will do things! And maybe we can build something neat out of this premise. Let’s do it!